99 luftballoons/where will all the pen pals go?

two people standing directly in front of each other. sides to the audience. they hold parchment or letterhead or white paper with writing on it.

person on left : dear friend, thank you for signing up to be my pen pal. i have looking for penpal for years. it will be too bad you don't speak the language i speak.
person on right : dear friend, i'm not sure what your last letter said. please retype and send again.
person on left : dear friend, sorrow for not making your senses. try again. i have thanks for you to be my pen pal. unfortunate, it is that we speak not languages that are similars.
person on right : dear friend, i'm not sure i still understand. we do not inherently speak the same language. do you think this assumption is correct?
person on left : dear friend! yes? i think we are saying same thing but with words apart. do you like nelly?
person on right : dear friend, yes what? who is nelly? is nelly where i am from? not all of the people in my country know each other.
person on left : dear friend, nelly, yes? his name is nelly? he has musics coming out? thongs?
person on right : dear friend, nelly and thongs? oh. yes! i know who you are speaking of. he was several years ago and didn't - can i use contractions with you? he did not have any more songs after that first one. do you enjoy politics?
person on left : dear friend, politics? yes! interesting! i like terminator and the wrestler who no longer on politics.
person on right : dear friend, yes, he was kind of an embarassment. the wrestler. the terminator, as you say - well - i'm on the fence.
person on left: dear friend, you should get down.
person on right: dear friend, it was a figure of speech. i am not on the fence, literally. i just do not know if i agree with his choices in office.
person on left: dear friend, yes. i know the joke, i make one back.
person on right (earnestly, sincerely): dear friend, right. i see. funny. you made me laugh very hard.

pause.

person on right: dear friend, i am sorry if i did not give you enough to respond with. i was noncommittal so to speak. do you know that word? it means i could not decide on some to answer with definitely.

pause.

person on right: dear friend, have i offended you?