The Snowman

A child builds a snowman. It has eyes, a nose, a mouth. With the ring of a xylophone, the snowman comes to life.

Snowman : Hello there, little Billy.
Billy : Snowman? You're alive?
Snowman : Yes. I am.
Billy : Wow. Wait until I tell my friends!
Snowman : Don't you want to know how I came to life?
Billy : I assumed it was the spirit of Winter, or Christmas, or Jesus or something.
Snowman : No, Billy. It's more complicated than that. Sit down a minute, it's time to put on our scientifi-
Billy begins to run off.
Billy : Mom! Dad! Jarod! My snowman came to life, just like in the movies! And video games!
Snowman : --thinking cap. Oh Billy! Wait!
Billy : And children's books!
Snowman : We have so much to talk about.
Billy : And adult books!
Snowman : Billy?
Billy : And magazines!
Snowman : I -
Billy : And podcasts!
Snowman : don't want to live like -
Billy : And puppet shows!
Snowman : this.
Over the next dialogue, the snowman pulls out a gun made of snow.
Billy : And stories from Grandma! And cartoons on cable! And cartoons on public access!
The snowman shoots himself in the head and falls over.
Billy : And stop motion shorts!