like margarine rubbed all over my body.

a person with a loaf of bread and a tub of margarine or butter. a pedestal with a toaster or toaster oven on it. he puts two slices of bread in the toaster or toaster oven and starts the timer. he removes all of his clothing (naked!) and opens the tub of butter. he rubs the butter all over his body until the toaster is finished toasting the bread.

person (to audience) : would you? could you? will you? what if i told you i were clean?

he stands, waiting for someone to do it.