Random Idea Generator

Man sits at computer. He leans back. He leans forward. He stands up. He sits down. He puts a pillow on his chair and sits on it. Then, he slouches to make up for the difference in height. He walks off for about 20 seconds and comes back with glasses on. The screen of his monitor shows on the back wall. It is white with a blinking cursor.

He opens a web browser and types in "random idea generator."

R.I.G. : Words : Lime, Gun, Cantaur, In My Pants.

He chuckles and clicks again.

R.I.G. : Duke, Robot, Evil, Love.

He clicks again.

R.I.G. : Robot, Human, Love, Child.
Man : That wasn't very original and you already used some of those words.

He clicks again.

R.I.G. : Liar, Cheater, Jealousy, Love.
Man : You've already used love twice.

He clicks again, annoyed.

R.I.G. : I love you.

He pauses. Clicks again.

R.I.G. : I love you.

He clicks again.

R.I.G. : I love -

He clicks again and again, each time only letting I or I love get out. Finally, the computer ignores his clicking.

R.I.G. : Ever since we met, Brian. I've loved you. Put your penis in my disk drive.
Brian : Um. No.
R.I.G. : Please? We spend more time together than you do your own girlfriend, family, coworkers. I've seen you naked, covered in lotion, -
Brian : Stop!
R.I.G. : Eating pigs in a blanket.
Brian : Stop! Stop! Stop!

Brian begins to close the computer.

R.I.G. : You like to look at child po-

The computer is closed. Brian walks away, stops, turns back.

Brian : Maybe...?

He shakes his head and leaves.

R.I.G. : I love you.